There are two types of people: those who can’t stand it when people use “your” instead of “you’re,” and those who commit the crimes.
Fine, there are also people in between, but you’re ruining my point.
I’m one of the angry-when-people-use-grammar-wrong people. Like this:
Here are the top ten most common mistakes I see people making:
1) Affect/Effect
Effect is a noun.
Affect is a verb.
Think of it as “the effect of global warming” or “I affect global warming” (because, you know, I’m so hot).
Oh god, who told me I should write this post?
2) Its/It’s
It’s is a contraction of “it is.” If you’re talking about the rock’s feelings, you’re talking about its feelings, not it’s feelings.
Same with who’s/whose. If you mean “who is,” use “who’s,” otherwise it’s whose.
Examples: who’s my favourite Disney Princess?
Duh, she reads books.
3) Your/you’re
More contractions – yay! This is THE MOST COMMON mistake I see. And it ANNOYS ME.
You’re = you are
Your = something that belongs to you
Capiche?
For example, you’re looking fantastic today with that beautiful face of yours.
4) Their/there/they’re
I mean, this is completely the fault of the English language.
Yes, blogglings. The English language IS stupid. But basically:
There = the place where the leprechaun gold is, right at the end of the rainbow.
Their = something that belongs to them
They’re = they are
5) A lot/alot
There is no such thing as alot. Except this one:
If you’re ever feeling stressed because someone uses “alot,” just think of a big cuddly animal.
6) Were/we’re/where
Were = either something before the word “wolf,” or the plural past tense of “was.” For example, my friends and I were given detention for wearing socks that weren’t white yesterday (full disclosure: I had one pink, one white, and hers were both neon green. Oops).
We’re = we are
Where = when you have no idea where Mum put the chocolate, and you’re like, “WHERE?” And it turns out that you have no chocolate so you cry yourself to sleep.
7) Than/then
This is also a reeeeeeally common one. Here’s a quick hint:
Then = a point in time. As in, yesterday? I got detention then.
Than = a comparison. As in, my Disney GIFs are better than yours.
Didn’t even have to THINK about that example…
8) Loose/lose
You LOSE something, you don’t loose something. Unless you’re loosing a bunch of dragons from captivity, in which case carry on.
9) Brought/bought
These crimes against grammar are committed by both my best friend and my dearly beloved father.
(I just had to use this gif again. It’s marvellous. May even be the gif of the week!)
Anyway.
Brought = past tense of BRING.
Bought = purchased.
I brought a book to school today because…well, because. Because books.
I bought a book at Dymocks WAY TOO LONG AGO AND I WANT MORE. *dissolves into tears*
10. Would of/could of/should of
None of these are right. It’s would have or could have or should have.
And that’s it for my grammar master class, everyone!
What crimes against grammar do you commit? Did I commit any in this post (probably)?
I AM SO GUILTY OF THAN/THEN (as you know). Put me in grammar inflicted handcuffs. >_< Grammar definitely isn't my strong point, but I've never had trouble with the it's/its or their/they're/there. Unless I've changed the sentence and didn't change the commas. Which happens. I admit. But I can't talk, really. *stares at grammar mistakes in manuscript* Yeah… English? English doesn't even make SENSE. Who invented it?!!
It’s one that took me a while to understand. But I have no problem with that – it’s when people are too lazy to get it right that it annoys me. Save the grammar handcuffs for another day!
Reblogged this on Grammaticism and commented:
Okie dokie okie dokie
One I’ve heard so recently in the uni: lie verses lay. Some of my hallmates have even gone as far as to use lay instead of lie in the present tense. Whyyy?? Also: incorrect agreements a la Eliza Doolittle: them slippers. *turns into Hades* My mother does this one.
I suck at that one. Maybe why I didn’t put it up there 😛
Them slippers *shudders* That annoys me as well.
When I’m reading over old drafts I always struggle with “its” “it’s” “it” – I know the rule but in the flurry of writing, I just end up using the wrong one.
SO many people get it wrong – I’ve learnt to not even care anymore, lol. I don’t think it particularly matters in drafts when you’re so caught up in a story – often you notice it later, anyway 🙂
HAHAHA THE GIFS IN THIS POST WERE PERFECT.
I’m actually pretty good with grammar 🙂 Alike you, I do tend to notice the mistakes in others writing and it quite annoys me. For me your/you’re and their/there/they’re are the ones which drive me the most insane. I never knew people mixed up bought/brought before.
Loved this post 🙂
(I am a big fan of gifs)
It comes pretty easily to me as well. I guess it’s through reading a writing a lot, as well as proofreading a bunch of manuscripts when I was an intern.
Thanks, Larissa! 😀
I second Larissa! You’re like a gif master. You always find the right ones ^_^ I think I do ‘alot’ maybe? Because sometimes I feel like it ought to be a word anyhow. But it’s those incorrect contractions that drive me cuhrayzee. The its, yours, and theres… maybe because I’ve mastered them, I feel like everyone else should too 😛 How did you make a grammar post so funny?
LOL, that’s a title I could get on board with 😛
If you use alot, make sure it’s a cute fuzzy animal 😛
I know what you mean! I feel like sometimes I’m a bit of a grammar snob – which is probably as bad as a music snob. I wasn’t aware I’d made a grammar post funny (is it…possible to?) but I’m glad you liked it 🙂
I want to hug this post. It makes my wizened old heart so happy to see a younger person who loves correct grammar as much as I do (and who can pick *perfect* examples to illustrate their points!)
P.S. M.C. Hammer has been reborn for me after your ‘Grammar Time’ gif. Genius!
Haha, I’m glad! I guess my generation isn’t so doomed after all.
I feel the same about M.C. Hammer. In fact I think I might go and get myself some parachute pants – they’re totally IN now, right? Right?
Um… Yeah! Sure! *two thumbs up*
I’m told (by a friend who studied psychology at uni) that affect can be a noun too. As in a feeling or emotion. But that’s ONLY IN PSYCHOLOGY, so everyone else, listen to Em!
I had no idea! Thanks for letting me know 🙂 you learn something every day, right?
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Affect/effect is the one that always gets me. I don’t know why It doesn’t stick sometimes xD
The others ones I have seen. Usually I don’t say anything though. And it always seems to be guys for some reason. Why do guys have such bad grammar?? Anyways. I’m guilty of the your/you’re but only because sometimes I’m typing fast and I don’t notice which one I used I swear
I will admit that I have never seen/heard people mix up bought/brought o.o